Where can I get one of these placebos?
Okay, it sounds like a line straight out of the Simpsons, but good buddy Michael passed on this little gem from Channel 10’s 9am news/talk show featuring host David Reyne. It follows from a recent drug trial gone wrong in the UK (absolutely, simply, terrifying to read about…), where for no apparent reason two people became very seriously ill after taking the test drug, while those given the placebo suffered no ill effects. However, there’s some confusion:
David Reyne (host): Some of these guys were given a placebo.
Dr. David Ritchie (guest): Correct
David Reyne: I don’t really understand what a placebo is, but it seems to have, to have saved them! And wouldn’t it make sense that every time a trial like this takes place, that there’s a placebo on hand.
Blink. Say again? The doctor quickly saves the host:
Dr. David Ritchie: A placebo is just an inactive agent! So it’s a…
Kim Watkins (other host): It’s a pretend drug.
Dr. David Ritchie: It’s a pretend drug – it could be sterile saline for example with no active agent in it.
David Reyne: I was thinking it was a cure of some sort.
Dr. David Ritchie: No.
I would have thought that placebo would be a fairly well known term, even amongst non-medical people! Heck, even just watching TV you should pick up that terminology, just by context, pretty quickly! And people wonder about the importance of science education…?! This is a truly fantastic line - bravo Michael for passing it on! Suffice to say, I’m sure our TV hosts will be doing their research before their next interviews. Or, maybe not.
Oh, and as long as we’re quoting placebo jokes, here’s a couple of my favourites. I had thought about putting all three up (two real jokes, one real quote) and getting people to pick which was real, but I didn’t think anyone would be able to tell…
An angry crowd has gathered outside the Hibbert Medical Clinic…
Crowd: We need a cure! We need a cure!
Hibbert: Ho ho ho. Why, the only cure is bedrest. Anything I give you would be a placebo.Woman: [frantic] Where can we get these placebos?
The crowd overturn a truck in search of placebos, but alas the only thing inside is a crate of killer bees.
Man seizes bee, puts it in mouth. “I’m cured! OW!!”
Or this one from the comic (cartoon) strip, Crock, which is scarily accurate, I fear:
Doctor: I’ve got to give you a shot. Do you have private health insurance?
Patient: No.
Doctor: Nurse, fetch the placebo.
It scares me that we have journos out there who don’t even have the most basic knowledge of science and scientific procedure. Assuming that they have tertiary education and these people are the source of information for the rest of us, what hope is there that scientists can get “the word” out accurately. We insist on basic literacy and numeracy tests for our kids so that they can survive in the modern world, but not science. You can ditch Science as a subject at Year 9 I believe, but you must do English until Year 12! Heaven forbid that we shouldn’t know our Shakespeare, but who cares if we don’t know what a “placebo” is! In this day and age it just doen’t make sense. How can you argue with someone about “intelligent design” if they don’t have the most basic of scientific concepts?